The Vanishing


Sorry for the extended absence.

The last couple of weeks have been absolutely insane with work and worry. For starters, my boss left on an extended 3-week vacation. Normally, this would be cause to kick up the feet, close the office door and begin trolling YouTube for ‘talent’ (just like Carson Daley does). My boss’ parting words seemed to validate that my plan was foolproof. “Don’t worry about a thing. The pricing is locked, the RFP is complete and the Peterson Account is a go.

(*Editor’s Note – “The Peterson Account” is the alias I use for all real-time work matters. Yes, I crib from Costanza.)

Well, as fate would have it, the Peterson Account had been pulled over doing 115 in a School Zone. The RFP is Swiss cheese. The lock on pricing had been jimmied. And I have been in serious damage control since then – leaving me to actually work for my paycheck. What is this – Commie Russia???

On top of this (and I almost hesitate to mention this for fear that I’ll work Mook’s patented “reverse jinx” on myself), Colin had recently decided to start Round 2 of his Sleep Deprivation experiment. You can read all the details of Round 1 here. For Round 2, he introduced an accomplice. In true sequel fashion, this tale has upped the ante from one adversary to two. So each night, Colin and Aria would take turns waking each other up. Just as we would get Colin’s sleepy head back to slumber, Aria would sound her namesake through the house. After a half-hour of calm, soothing comfort (a favorite lullaby of mine is “Please, for the Love of All That Is Holy and Good and Worth Saving on this Godforsaken Night of No Slumber, Go to Sleep My Baby“), Aria would subside. Once Aria was safely tucked away in dreamland, Colin would awake. This continued night after night for the past few weeks. Night of the Living Ed would segueway to Dawn of the Ed. Unfortunately, I’m too tired to munch brains, so I subsist on Frosted Mini-Wheats.

Now – as postscript to that madness – we dropped some mad bank on a new bedroom set for Colin, a big boy bunk bed and bureau set. As I write this, he has been up for a 1/2 hour (having slept straight through the night) and refuses to get out of bed as he likes his bed too much. I went up to see if he wanted to come down about 20 minutes ago, and he said, “Stay in bed a little longer?“ The message here, there’s no problem money can’t fix.

The last crisis that has conspired to keep me disconnected has to do with my damn eyes. Sometime over the last month or so, I started having problems with my peepers. Specifically, I seemed to be getting headaches and feel myself squinting quite a bit whenever I worked on the computer for too long. In this case, too long equals five minutes. As my job requires me to be tethered to my laptop, this causes a bit of concern.

The actual sensation felt much like the temporary afflictions my allergies can bring on during hay fever season. Usually I have minor flare ups, but this was just too damn persistent. Ten minutes at work and the eyes would water, the low-grade headache would arrive and my day was shot. Of course, I have tons of work to do, so I soldiered through and finally set up an appointment (my first ever) with an ophthalmologist.

I went for the eye exam last week. They probed my orbs six ways to Sunday and the prognosis came in.

Eye Doc:   I have good news and bad news. The good news is, I can’t find anything wrong with your eyes. The bad news is… I can’t find anything wrong with your eyes.

I was told I had better than 20-20 vision and instructed to see an Ears/Nose/Throat doctor to see if my eye issue may be a sinus issue. That appointment is set for later this month. So, the good news is my bionic vision is retained. But what the hell is wrong with me?

Anyway, the long and short of it is, with me staring at a PC all day long, I have tried to limit my exposure in the evenings. Although (fingers crossed) as I write this, I don’t feel as bad as I have in prior days. Fingers crossed.

Oh, and there’s one more project that has stolen my time.


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